Friday, 8 August 2014

Show don't tell.

A few days ago Room 17 had to write a story in a third person about going into a scary forest.I think I done well at using my imagination.But I think I need to work on using more describing words.

As he  was walking through the misty fog he could see lots of tree’s swaying side to side and the sticks were crackling like someone was standing on it. He could feel trancherlers  crawling up his legs,he could see zombies coming out of their graves.  Witch's flying up in the sky.  As he was walking over a slippery bridge blood was  squirted on the trees.  Skeletons  scattered on the ground. Vampires leaping from tree to tree.  Shadows circling around him.  Little girls running like crazy.  People walking around with no eyeballs.  He could hear clowns laughing in the distance.As he was walking he could hear giants snoring.  Then suddenly...

1 comment:

  1. Hi Hine I like now you put doing word's in your writing and did the forest had any think else in it